5 Reasons Why JJ Abrams’ Superman Was the Worst Ever

With so many people focused on what JJ Abrams is doing with Star Wars: The Force Awakens, many forget that he was hired by Warner Brothers to write Superman in the early 2000s. Superman: Flyby was the reboot that was to be directed by McG before he dropped out and Brett Ratner nearly torpedoed the franchise like it was X-Men. Both future Superman, Brandon Routh and Henry Cavill, auditioned for the role in this movie and you can even find pictures of them in the costume online.

But the big thing about the movie was its script, which is actually available online if you look for it. While some people may dislike Abrams for what he did with Star Trek, and even more will hate him for his Star Wars choices, his Superman script remains the most unforgivable piece of crap he ever put his name on. If this were to have been made, it would’ve killed the Superman franchise for decades.

Here are five reasons why JJ Abrams wrote what would’ve been the worst Superman movie ever made:

Krypton Doesn’t Explode

Heh, you really don’t need to know much than that to know it sucks. Nope, Krypton doesn’t explode. Instead it’s a serene planet with rolling green hills, giant shell-less turtles, and a raging civil war that makes its way to Earth. Superman wasn’t sent away from a dying planet, he was sent to Earth after Jor-El met and chose the Kents for him so he could fulfill a dumb prophecy about a child who would end the war on a distant world before returning home to rule.

Superman is Neo from The Matrix

You kind of need to understand that Abrams wrote this movie after The Matrix was a huge hit for Warner Brothers, and the two Matrix sequels were in production. So since Neo knew kung-fu, so did Superman and the rest of the Kryptonians. That was the basis for the fights in the movie, and it would’ve severely dated the movie as just riding on the coattails of The Matrix’s success. The disappointment of The Matrix sequels wouldn’t have helped it much either.

Lex Luthor is From Krypton

This was actually the big twist at the end of the movie. After Superman manages to kung-fu fight all of the evil Kryptonians into defeat, Lex Luthor reveals to him that he too is from Krypton. So Superman and Luthor have a big Neo vs Agent Smith super-powered kung-fu fight in the sky before Lex is defeated and Superman returns with him to Krypton. Gotta set up the boring Krytponian-based sequel!

The Ma Kent “Rape”

The script makes it clear the Superman’s powers began manifesting even as a baby, but Abrams wanted to make his power development just a little edgier. So he wrote a scene where a creepy landlord was about to rape Ma Kent so little six-year-old Clark could kick his ass. By the time that happens in the movie we knew Clark’s powers were there, so there was no reason to toss in an implied rape just to shock people. Of course it’s not shown in a PG-13 movie, but it’s heavily implied that if Clark didn’t step in, that’s what was going to happen.

Ty-Zor

Everyone complains that Superman movies are stuck between Lex Luthor and General Zod as villains. Where’s Brainaic or Metallo? Superman has other villains, but instead of using one of those Abrams just recreated General Zod in Ty-Zor. It’s basically the exact same character and serves the same purpose, but he has a different name. Even worse is when Ty-Zor is defeated, Lex Luthor is his replacement as another super-powered villain from Krypton.